Put the Cool in Back to School

Tuesday, July 29, 2008

Computers are on sale. The Top Party School’s have been reveled. The Miley Cyrus and HSM (High School Musical for those who aren’t in the know) school supplies are on sale.


It’s officially back to school season.

Most of my readers won’t be hitting the books this fall, but that doesn’t mean we can’t celebrate. Here are some ways to salute no-tests with cheap beer.

College Party: Dust off your favorite frat shirt, pick up some red cups and throw things back to your college days. While you can finally afford a keg on your own, still charge your friends $3 for a cup and don’t forget to whip up a batch of jungle juice. Girls – no college party is complete without wearing black pants. Bonus points if you don’t wear a coat and it’s freezing out. Accessorize with your sorority lavaliere.


Un-Tailgate: Pre-game for the pre-game with an untailgate party. Football hasn’t started just yet, but practice makes perfect. Gather a bunch of friends together on a Saturday at 7 a.m. for kegs and eggs. Binge drink until the sun goes down and make drunk calls to friends to discuss how “this year is the year.” Have your alma mater or fight song ready to play and purchase last year’s team highlight film to play on repeat.



Best in Class: Remember when you voted on class personalities for your high school yearbook? Bring that concept to life with a theme party. A month before your celebration, write a number of categories on slips of paper and assign each of your friends a personality. That person will need to dress the part for the upcoming party. Include favorites like class partier, nerd, jock, cheerleader, homecoming queen, slut, rocker, band geek (look right) and chess team member. You can always use the same concept with cult school movie classics like “Animal House,” “Fast Times at Ridgemont High,” “Old School,” “Pretty in Pink,” “Grease” and “High School Musical.”

To make this a true high school party, buy cans of Keystone and Busch, Mad Dog (serve it in brown bags) and Zima (don't forget the Jolly Rancher garnish). End the party at midnight - after all you used to have a curfew!





(sources: awildride.net)
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Christmas in July

Friday, July 25, 2008

Today is July 25th. I like to call it Christmas in July.
If this really was Christmas in July, I would have opened my presents last night. Santa comes early to the Bonkowski house because my sister and I are super good.

Below is a list of things I wish I was opening today.

Flower Power: One time reader J. Bo actually included this item on her birthday list (Bonkowski girls love lists), but now I am stealing it. These Juicy flower earrings are just too cute. Earrings are a great investment for me because I seriously wear a pair daily.

Tetris Handheld Gold: Brady can confirm that my handheld Tetris was one of my favorite Christmas 2007 gifts. This model takes things up a notch with color! I am sure this would keep me away from the airport bar next time I am stuck!


Bellissimo Bocce: Walking on the lake path this week, I witnessed some kind of Bocce Tournament on the beach at Oak Street. This made me ponder: 1. why wasn’t I invited and 2. I really need a Bocce Set. A quick internet search reveals these things are pricier than I thought, however, I would like the $49 set from Target. With one of these babies, I can crash the next beach event.


Sleeping Beauty: You know you are getting old when you start to ask for house-wear items for Christmas (or over 25 and not married). I’ve been giving my bedroom a mini-makeover this month starting with a new duvet cover and pillows. Rather than buy a new mattress (which I am in need of), I think my sleep would improve with a Feather Bed. You can find these at Macy’s, BBB and almost any place that sells bedding.

Crusin’ European Style: In college, 40 percent of me wanted to study abroad. Now that I am older, it’s something I 100 percent regret. I know my dad would have b*tched about the cost, but I totally could have taken out a loan and pay it back. Well that’s the past. Looking forward, I am really itching to go to Europe. I think the best way for me to travel there would be a cruise. I found one on Carnival that takes you to some of my top desires – Italy, Turkey, and Athens. Of course if you buy this for me, get yourself a ticket too!




(Sources: target.com, gifts.com, carnival.com, juicycorture.com, aol.com)
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It’s My Wine in a Box

Thursday, July 24, 2008

Early this week, I wrote about boxed wine. For the last decade, this beverage has been the ugly stepsister of the vino industry - It’s unattractive, cheap and frankly doesn’t last as long.

Recently, wine a la cardboard has gone through a chic transformation into an acceptable entertaining option. Critics are favoring boxed wine’s easy transportation (picnics!) and eco-friendly qualities (less packaging, more wine). More wine companies are stepping into the game – making the quality greater than before.

Here are some other pro’s to boxed wine:
- It’s Better for Lushes: A box is equivalent to about 4 bottles of wine
- Cheap Date: Boxed wine is like $14 a box vs. like $24 if you bough the same amount in bottles
- Age is Just a Number: You don’t need to wait for wine in a box to age. AND if you are waiting for it to age, chances are you’re a liquor snob.
- No Glass Bottles: Totally gets past most parking lots tailgating laws. I would also bet you can fit the wine bag inside the box down your shirt and sneak it into a stadium. Less noise than the cans.

Franzia is one of the biggest players in the boxed wine arena, but it isn’t the only option. Here are some others.


Grown Up Juice Box: A few years ago on a solo business trip to Denver, I sampled Three Thieves wine at a food festival. Okay, I didn’t just sample, I consumed several varieties. Give a girl a break, I had like 100+ tickets to the fest and no one would take them when I offered to strangers. Anyways, Three Thieves Bandit collection has these awesome juice boxes of wine that are just adorable and delicious. I actually just might order myself some today for my beach/pool trips.


Wine Cubed: I’ve also sipped (or thrown back) the Wine Cube from Target. While it isn’t sold in every state (sorry PA), the Wine cube comes in a number of flavors and smaller than a box of Franzia. It also has cuter packaging.



Once You Go Black: Another option is Black Boxed Wine. After looking at their web site, this brand seems a little too serious to me. Although, I love some of their tag lines like “Think inside the Box.”

Next time you are buying wine for a party, consider the box option. If you are still too embarrassed to put your box on display, consider pouring the bag of wine into an elegant glass pitcher.


(Sources: threetheives.com, San Francisco Chronicle, wikipedia, target.com, winbreis.com, sunset.com, blackboxwine.com)
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Tour de Franzia

Monday, July 21, 2008

Flipping through the channels over the last week or so, I keep seeing that some silly station is airing the Tour de France…and it’s on like EVERYDAY. So I did a little research and found out that this thing is 23 days and over 2,000 miles – insane!

When I think of the Tour de France, of course I immediately think of Lance Armstrong. But right after that, my mind drifts to the word Franzia – “The World’s Most Popular Wine” that is “Bringing Joy to Everyday Life.” (direct quotes from the web site).

At some point in your life, reader, I would bet that you have experienced a delicious glass of boxed wine. You may even have drank from the spout keg stand-style or “tapped the bag.” Whatever your style, Franzia has been the start of a number of good memories. Why not create some more with a Tour de Franzia.


This wine tasting is like no other. When guests arrive, be sure to give them their own wine glass. To make the party more exciting, ask people to bring their own customized glass (think pimp goblet!).

The boxed-wine is actually sold in three categories – Vintner Select, Old World Classics and House Wine Favorites - for a total of 24 flavors. These families can build the three rooms of your tour.

In the Vintner Select room, complement the wine with some French munchies like French Fries, cheeses and breads. You want to make sure people are absorbing the wine with some food!

The Old World Classics are a crafted in a semi-dry style. You will want to have a lot of water and Gatorade on this stop of the tour. Consider adding some sweets, like a fun fondue, in this room.

Pair your signature appetizer recipes with the Franzia House Wine Favorites category. These wines are “refreshing, fruity and bursting with fresh aromas.”

If you have a nice outdoor entertaining area or a patio, I suggest you purchase some inexpensive tricycles and have races to tie in the whole bike thing. If someone is super-good, totally call them out for doping and issue them with a BUI (biking under the influence). Don’t forget the Livestrong bracelets as party favors!

Franzia is actually celebrating its 100 year anniversary in 2008 – another excuse for a party!

Brandi*’s Note: According to the Urban Dictionary, there is a much more dangerous way to host this party that I would have totally did in college if I knew about it. Once guests arrive, everyone is assigned to a team. Each team is given a box of Franzia and the first team to finish wins. While I am a binge drinker, I don’t want to encourage it!

(sources: franzia.com, urban dictionary, toy-station.com, sizzup.com, americarulez.com)
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Superhero Cocktails

Thursday, July 17, 2008

All the buzz right now in Chicago is the new Batman movie. Just incase you don’t know, the new Batman movies with Christian Bale use the Windy City as a backdrop for the fictional Gotham. People are so excited to see the city in the Hollywood spotlight, my regular movie theater is sold out on Friday and Saturday.




For this Thirsty Thursday, I did a little on-line research on Super Hero Cocktails.

The Absolut Web site has a cocktail appropriate called the “Superhero.”

Superhero
2 parts Absolut Vodka
3 parts Blueberry Syrup
2 parts Tequila
Raspberry
Chill a sling glass with ice or in the freezer. Pour Absolut vodka, blueberry syrup and tequila into a shaker. Fill the shaker with ice cubes and shake it until the shaker is very cold. Empty the sling glass from ice and water. Strain the drink into the sling glass. Garnish with a raspberry (whole)

Batman appears to be a virgin – at least in the cocktail world. Three Web sites, include idrink.com, feature this recipe for a non-alcoholic “Batman.”

Batman Cocktail
½ oz.Orange juice
½ tsp.Grenadine
Orange slices
Pour the juice and grenadine into a highball glass almost filled with ice cubes.Stir well. Garnish with the orange slice

Unless you are living under a rock, you know the Batman sequel stars Heath Ledger as the Joker. And I must say a very scary Joker at that (super glad I am seeing the movie at 3 in the afternoon). I found this recipe for Joker’s Tea on the Drink of the Week blog – be careful with this drink. It looks rather powerful!

Joker's Tea
In a PINT glass filled w/ice pour the following:
1/2 oz Tequila
1/2 oz Vodka
1/2 oz Rum
1/2 oz Jim Beam
1/2 oz Blue Curacao
Fill rest with 1/3 Sweet&Sour, 2/3 Coke. Shake and add lime wedge. Similar to a long island ice tea, you can adjust the coke for taste. Caution - This is a potent drink

Before you go, I suggest that you watch the first Batman movie in this series. No, not the Michael Keaton ones, but the first one with Christan Bale. Us Montour grads will always remember where the original Batman was from (don’t be jealous EHT – not everyone can have famous alums).

(Sources: absolutrecipes.com, idrink.com, drinkoftheweek.com, moviesmedia.ign.com, warnerbros.com)
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Make it Work

Wednesday, July 16, 2008


Without a lot of fanfare, the 5th season of “Project Runway” starts tonight on Bravo. If your into media news, you are aware there is a fight over the show between the creators and networks. Tonight marks the last season on Bravo, so to show their bitterness, the network hasn’t done much of an advertising push around the show. While I hate the feeling of being forced to watch Lifetime to see me some Heidi+Tim, I can't get enough.

I’ve always wanted to host a “Project Runway”-style party. I’ve imagined three versions of this – two for at-home viewing parties and one for a mall that’s a little less PR. Here’s what I’ve imagined.

Party #1 - Be Tim Gun and Host a Challenge
* Find your craftiest, “Project Runway” friends (girls or those men obsessed with fashion) and invite them over for a design challenge. As host, you should dress the part of either Tim Gunn or Heidi Klum (my girl crush)

* Host the party on a Saturday during one of those all-day “Project Runway” marathons

* Visit the local thrift store and scour the racks for pieces that can serve as an inspiration and base for your designers. Ask your relatives for their goodwill items too. Also pick up some fabric on sale from Jo-Anne’s and some inexpensive sequins, feathers, etc. Don’t forget those coupons!

* Make it Rain in the at your dollar store and stock up on sewing materials like scissors, needles, push pins, tape measures, etc.

* Challenge guests to recreate the old fashions into something new. Block off an area of your pad as a runway and have people dress in their creation while they are judged. Totally throw in your best Michael, Heidi and/or Nina

* For those obsessed with the show, but not willing to participate in the challenge, create a PR Quiz. Buy apparel from the Bravo Web site for prizes!

* The emphasis for this party should be the activity. Serve mini-portions of comfort foods like mini-burgers, mini-hot dogs and mac ‘n cheese in ramekins. Prepare cocktails with white spirits so they don’t spill on the creations (i.e. Effen Black Cherry & Sprite!)



Party #2 - Make PR a Drinking Game

If you’ve watched every episode and every season millions of times like me, while the cast changes, there are some things that remain the same. Honor those similarities with a “Project Runway” drinking game. The show is practically the girls’ version of football, so why not add booze.

Each time one of the following things happens, take a swig!
* Tim Gunn says “Make it Work!” “Carry on” or “Send your models to the (enter sponsor) hair salon”
* A contestant cries or says “Oh my god”
* Someone says “I’m not here to make friends”
* A sewing machine breaks
* Show sponsor is mentioned (i.e. Bluefly, Elle Magazine, Hershey’s, etc.)
* “I’m not here to make friends” is mentioned by a contestant (a reality show staple)
* Designer is still fixing their garmet as the model is walking to the runway
* A word is bleeped out (drink twice if it is at the sewing machine)
** Chug your drink if a model falls on the runway


Party #3 - The Look for Less
This idea is more a knock off of the old Style Network show “The Look For Less,” but is still a good idea for the fashion obsessed.

* During a low-traffic shopping weekend (no holiday!), invite friends to meet at a designated shopping area with a picture of an outfit/look they really like, but can’t afford. Ask them to also provide their shoe and clothing sizes on a slip of paper

* Consider meeting at a Starbucks or breakfast spot. Over coffee, swap outfits with people in your group. Tell everyone that they have 3 hours and only $50 to duplicate the look

* Make sure that your shopping area has some low-cost stores that have trendy clothing options like Forever 21, Charlotte Russe, H&M, etc.

* Once time is up, meet and model your new look! Arrange a girls’ night out or dinner afterwards.

Misc. Ideas
Bravo suggests hosting two different viewing parties. The first asks guests to dress like their favorite character (while she isn’t my fave, I would be Laura from season 3) and the second suggests asking guests to bring old cloths and donate them to charity. You could also turn that into a Bitch & Swap and exchange second-hand goodies with your friends.

(Sources: Bravo.com)
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Happy 10,000th Day To Me!

Tuesday, July 15, 2008


Chance are you probably forgot to send me a card, but according to sites like this, today is my 10,000th day of living.
I'd rather have cupcakes over a card anyways.
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Tips, Tips, Tips

Monday, July 14, 2008

I love the feeling of discovering a new party tip. I know, I am a nerd. Below you will find a few of my favs.

* When hosting a party, don’t’ make a menu of all new items. Gradually introduce new items


* Focus on presentation over preparation. Don’t spend crazy money and time trying to create a perfect party. Just present the food/decorations you are able to do in the best way possible. Serve pudding in martini glasses, garnish a shot of tomato soup with a mini grilled cheese wedge, make sand and serve in a sand bucket. For a decoration, gather two vases – a bigger one and a smaller one. Place the little vase inside the larger one. Fill the space between the two vases with some unexpected like colorful M&M’s or gumballs. Lastly, fill the middle vase with a plant or some flowers

* The most common food allergies are nuts and seafood; check ahead with your guests attending and make note if any of your recipes include these items

* Have enough glasses on hand so that everyone can have two. This is important if you are going to go all fancy and use real glasses vs. red cups (which now come in blue!)

* A .750 mil bottle of alcohol can make about 12 drinks. If you have heavy drinkers on hand, I would assume that it makes 8-10

* Avoid hosting a party during a high-traffic party season, like the holidays, Halloween or Memorial Day. Consider moving your bash to the off-season (March, April or September) to ensure a maximum crowd

* Great cocktails start with great ingredients. Skip the cheap stuff

* If you have the space, move the food table away from the wall so that people can reach it from both sides. This eliminates a long line. If you live in a small apartment, bring the foods to different levels to maximize your table space. To achieve this, use cake states and bowls turned upside down

* Never put carbonated drinks into a cocktail shaker. Remember that time you opened up a pop can that was shaken too much? That is what you are doing to the beverage in the shaker. Shake the beverage before adding carbonation OR build the ingredients over ice and stir




(picture sources: haroldcatering.com, design.hgtv.com)
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Help Wanted

Sunday, July 13, 2008

Okay, I've spent at least 3 hours trying to figure out how to put a graphic on the sidebars of this blog. If you know someone who can help, please send them my way!
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Let Them Eat Cake

Friday, July 11, 2008

Next Monday, July 14th, its Bastille Day – a French Holiday that celebrates the storming of the Bastille; which was seen as a symbol of the uprising of the modern French nation.


Bastille Day is celebrated around the U.S. with a number of festivities. In New York City, there is a celebration each year in the Upper East Site, while San Francisco has a big party in its historic French Quarter. Suprisingly to me, Milwaukee has a four-day Bastille Days street festival begining with a "Storming of the Bastille" with a 43-foot replica of the Eiffel Tower.

While Bastille Day doesn’t mean much to me (I am a mutt, but not of French decent), I feel it’s a great theme for a party!

Here are some suggestions for hosting your own Bastille Day party:


Let Them Eat (Cup)Cake(s)! Honor the former Queen of France with a cake-themed bash. While Marie Antoinette may or may not have said the famous phrase, if you seen the Kristen Dunst MA loved extravagant things and was a total fashion icon of her time. You can put a Brandi* spin on the party by serving cupcakes. For some great recipes, visits one of my favorite food porn blogs - Cupcakes Take the Cake. Don’t forget to make French Vanilla!

Red, White & Blue: You can throw a Bastille Day party for less buy purchasing some left over 4th of July decorations. France shares the same colors as the U.S.! To make your célébration more tres chic, add in things like pictures of the Eiffel Tower, topiary trees and berets. To get friends speaking the role, print and display common words with their French translation around the room.

We Poppin’ Bottles Like we Won the Championship Game: Champagne can only be called Champagne if it comes from France. Purchase some inexpensive bubbly (my fav!).

French Fry Bar: While they may not totally be French, they contain the word. Loyal readers know that I love me a themed bar at a party. Soak up the Champagne with a DIY French Fry bar. Order a huge bundle of fries from your fav bar and set up a spread of toppings like Heinz Ketchup, mustard (for Brady), cheese, japelenos, onions (yuck), bacon bits, pepperjack cheese, hot sauce, ranch dressing, etc.

Bonjour Brunch: Aside from the fries, another popular French item in America is pastries. A bunch is one of the easiest parties to host. Purchase a spread of items from a local bakery, bring out the champagne and invite friends over for breakfast. This is also a good time to get people together.

If you don’t have room for a spread, consider buying a number of store bought fries and conducting a taste test!

French Kiss: If you are considering a signature drink, look no further than the French 75. Impress guests with your French history by informing them that the drink was created by Franco-American World War I flying ace Raoul Lufbery who was part of Escadrille Américaine air fighting unit.

French 75
- 1 1/2 oz Gin
- 2 oz Lemon Juice
- Champagne
- 2 tsp Superfine Sugar
- Garnish: Cherry
Mix all ingredients in a cocktail shaker with ice except champagne. Strain into a champagne flute (or collins glass). Top with champagne. Garnish with cherry.
(Source: Wikipedia, cocktailtimes.com, celebrations.com, NYTimes.com)
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Melly K. Day

Thursday, July 10, 2008

This Saturday, once reader Melissa Koger (now Kluchurosky) will celebrate her 27th Birthday. While we tend to disagree in beer selections, I will honor Melly this Thirsty Thursday with a salute to her favorite beverage – Miller Lite.

“When it hits your lips – it’s orgasmic,” once said Melly about her love for Miller Lite.

Here are some facts about Melly’s beloved beer – and while you may not like Miller Lite like me, these facts are sure to make a good conversation starter for the next person you see drinking it!

* Considered the first mainstream light beer

* Created by Joseph L. Owades, a biochemist working at New York’s Rheingold Brewery, in 1967

* The recipe was given to one of Miller’s competitors in Chicago – Meister Brau, which came out with the beer and dubbed it a “Lite” option in the late ‘60’s

* Miller bought out Meister Brau and created “Lite Beer from Miller” in 1975. After its introduction, Miller Lite rose in popularity by using masculine pro sports players in its ads.

* Riding on the heels of Miller’s success, Bud Light (a Brandi* fav) was introduced in 1982

* One Miller Lite contains 96 calories

* The beer’s slogan is “Great Taste…Less Filling.” This ad campaign was ranked by Advertising

* Age magazine as the 8th best campaign in history

* As of 1992, light beer is the biggest domestic beer in the United States

(sources: Wikipedia, millerlite.com)
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Alcho-Pops

Tuesday, July 08, 2008

First, there were shots.

Next came Jell-O shots.

Now it’s Alcho-Pops.

Popsicles are a summer staple. Now stores like Sur La Table and Target are making it easier for people to create their own popsicles.

This past weekend, I took popsicles to a new level with my own at home “spirited” concoction.

I used the recipe below found on drinkmixer.com and star molds from Sur La Table to create a little treat for Friday’s fireworks on the beach night.

While they were a total hit, I believe I put a little too much fun into the pops and they melted very quickly. However, eating them outside was a great idea so the pops didn’t drip on the carpet.

If you come to my apartment in the next week of so, you just might be able to taste one of the remaining pops!

Purple Popsicle Recipe2 oz Skyyvodka
2 oz Welch's grape juice
8 oz ginger ale

Pour in 2 shots of chilled vodka. Add 2 shots chilled grape juice. Fill the rest of the glass with ginger ale. Shake or stir (stirring preferred), and serve.

(Sources: drinksmixer.com, tovolo.com)
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Introducing Miss B's Etiquette

Monday, July 07, 2008

Today over lunch, reader Brian and I brainstormed the following topic that has been on my mind for the past few months.

Inappropriate questions.

A few months ago, Brian stopped a girl he went to college with near Wrigley Field. This acquaintance asked for his phone number so she could call him when she came to town. As she went to enter it in her phone, she said “What is your last name.” Brian was fairly offended by this. Not that he would have hung out with her anyways, but why do you really want the number of someone that you can’t even remember their last name? She easily could have wrote “poopie head” into her phone to save herself the embarrassment of forgetting a “friends” last name.

As a 27-year-old, unmarried female, you find yourself being asked more and more inappropriate questions. While I believe that further down the road, more “don’t go there” questions will be asked, I’ve decided to list the things you just shouldn’t ask people, with some reasoning and suggested answers.

Question #1: Are you pregnant?
Why? Just like celebrities who eat a cheese burger, bloat up and are immediately put on bump watch, this question is just wrong to ask someone. If they were knocked up, they would most likely tell you. In most cases, the female is just having a fat day (hence the probable leggings). On this same subject, don’t ask someone what they plan on naming their baby. If you ask and they reply “Jayden” you may spin into a story about how that is Brittney Spears' baby and how he isn’t very cute. This will most likely offend that person and force her to regret the name selection. In addition, we all know what happened on "Friends"- don't discuss your 'baby name' either or else someone will take it.
Suggested Answers:
- Smile & say “Why do you want to know?”
- “That’s an inappropriate question to ask a woman.” (Ashlee Simpson’s answer when asked if she was knocked up!)


Question #2: When are you going to get married?
Why? Like question number one, this subject is popular at family functions. Chances are, if you are asking a girl this she is either single or has been in a relationship for a long time. I’d put more money it is on the later. I think this is just wrong to ask a woman, because she really isn’t in control (unless she is doing the asking).
Suggested Answers:
- “When everyone can.”
- “Whenever it happens.”
- “Hopefully soon.”
- “When he can save up enough money to buy me a ring.”


Question #3: How much money do you earn?
Why? Really, this question is none of your business. Especially if you are asking a co-worker. Total no, no. With the internet and salary calculators, you can probably figure out the answer yourself.
Suggested Answers:- “Not enough.”
- “You’ll have to wait for my biography to come out.”


Other “DO NOT ASK” questions…- How much did your house cost?
- When are you going to have kids?
- Are you gay?


There are also some generic responses that can be used for the above questions. They include:
- “That’s for me to know and you to find out.”
- Use no words – just give them ‘the look.’
- “I consider that question inappropriate, let’s talk about something else.” (I find that a little harsh)
- “I have the right to remain silent.”
- “Why do you ask?”
- “Bite me.”

(sources: yahoo.answers, Washingtonpost.com, instyle.com, bigpinkquestionmark.com, davisfamily.com)
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Stuff Yinzers Like

Sunday, July 06, 2008

During some down time from my tour guide duties this weekend, I discovered this awesome Pittsburgh-focused blog that just I just love.

“Stuff Yinzers Like” is a spin off the book released on July 1st called “Stuff White People Like.” The Yinzer blog explains things that Pittsburgh people love and also includes a paragraph for outsiders to understand the weird traditions.

Here are some snippets of my favorite postings…

Posting #5: Fireworks
- “There is really no other way of saying this — Yinzers just freakin’ love fireworks.”
- “If you’re invited to a Yinzer’s house for the fourth of July, be ready for anything. Review the instructions on the fire extinguisher, do a little research on first aid tips, and always be on the lookout for a kid with a sparkler trying to poke you in the ass.”

Posting #3: Steelers QB’s (this one really hit home for me..ah hem Brady):
- “If the quarterback is not playing well, then there is only one logical conclusion to make — he must be gay.”
- “Any Yinzer worth his weight in perogies had a cousin’s friend’s uncle’s boyfriend’s sister that had actually SEEN Kordell Stewart cruising for gay sex in Schenley park.”
- “If you’re unaware of the latest, the conversation will inevitably lead to talking about Kordell Stewart’s great-player-to-gay conversation. If this occurs, stay calm and immediately align yourself as closely as you possibly can with this idea, declaring that you can’t believe how gay he was.”

Posting #2: Voulenteer Fire Halls (another one I can relate to!)
- “Going to the fire hall is a rite of passage for developing Yinzers (Youngzers), and their first exposure is usually at a fundraiser.”
- “Despite the near-orgasmic love Yinzers have for fundraisers, fire halls are at their best when used for weddings.
- "If you ever encounter a Yinzer talking about an event that has happened at a fire hall, nod approvingly. In fact, ask at which volunteer fire company the event took place and if the Yinzer happens to know the Fire Chief. While you might not actually care, you will have a friend for life, and might score an Iron City beer out of the interaction."

For those jag off’s that aren’t from Pittsburgh, you should bookmark this blog. It will help you understand where I come from and prepare you for that inevitable trip to Da ‘Burgh.

(sources: http://stuffyinzerslike.com/, cafepress.com)
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Wind, Rain, Snow, Sleet and Seiche?

Thursday, July 03, 2008

Brady told me that I need to start breaking news on my blog, so he is my first attempt at doing so. (I think he is worried about my readership of 3).

Reader Amy said she loved Chicago, but she can't put up with the weather.

Well yesterday, I've had a first in the weather category during my three and a half years here.

Chicago almost had a Seiche. No, I didn't make this word up. We has a Seiche warning.

What is a Seiche? According to Wikipedia....

A seiche (pronounced /seɪʃ/, or approximately saysh) is a standing wave in an enclosed or partially enclosed body of water. Seiches and seiche-related phenomena have been observed on lakes, reservoirs, bays and seas. The key requirement for formation of a seiche is that the body of water be at least partially bounded, allowing natural phenomena to form a standing wave.

So yes, we were almost hit by a lake tidal wave. Never fear - the beaches are back open and I plan on planting myself in the sand tomorrow (see "my" beach above). I hope to get a spot by the new palm trees they planted!

Cheers to a seiche free 4th!
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